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Criss Angel Is A Douchebag Transcript
{{TranscriptHead
|Episode= [[4.12 Criss Angel Is A Douchebag]]
|AirDate= 22 Jan 2009
}}
TEASER
INT. BAR
BARTENDER
Wow. You're really good.
VANCE
Yeah, great. Hey, show us another.
VANCE'S ASSISTANT
Finish your drink, Vance.
JAY
This is a simple riffle shuffle.
BARTENDER
Do a card trick for me.
VANCE
Ooh, here we go --The incredible Jay.
JAY
All right, young lady, would you please tell me when to stop?
BARTENDER
Stop.
JAY
This is your card.Commit it to memory. Hmm?
VANCE
That's incredible, Jay.
VANCE'S ASSISTANT
Don't be a jerk.
JAY
Right, do you see your card?
BARTENDER
Um, no, I don't.
JAY
No, the cards say "no."
VANCE
Check his pocket.
VANCE'S ASSISTANT
For god's sake, Vance.
VANCE
Oh, just check --Check the damn pocket!
JAY
So, if you then would remove...
VANCE
(pulls the card from Jay's pocket)
Is this your card?
BARTENDER
Why are you so mean? Can't you just leave the old guy alone?
INT. THEATER
CHARLIE
Is he wearing eyeliner?
VERNON
Can't tell. I'm blinded by all the sterling silver.
JEB DEXTER
The light has to find me!
Get it?! It --It has to find me!
CHARLIE & VERNON
What a douche bag.
JAY
Would guys give it a rest? You're giving me a headache.
VERNON
Oh, come on, Jay. His misdirect is shaking his ass like an 8th avenue hooker.
CHARLIE
Used to be about skill.
JAY
Yeah, used to be. Used to be. Listen to the you two. It's pathetic.
Bitter, old men talking about the glory days. You know what? This
douche bag isn't the joke. We are.
CHARLIE
Hey, who you calling a joke?
JAY
Me, for one.
(gesturing towards Jeb, on stage) That used to be us.
You know, maybe he is a douche bag, but he's playing the main stage,
And we can't even afford an assistant. What the hell are we doing?
CHARLIE
We're doing all right.
JAY
No, we're not. We're sad, we're old...And we're dying.
CHARLIE
Jay.
JAY
I'm gonna do the table of death tonight.
VERNON
No. No, you're not, Jay. Don't be crazy.
CHARLIE
You almost killed yourself the last time
you tried it. And that was 30 years ago!
JAY
Oh, who cares if it kills me? At least I'll go out with a headline.
INT. BAR WITH STAGE
JAY ( onstage)
Ladies and gentlemen, What you are about to see is not a trick or an illusion --Simply a display of daring and dexterity.
(Charlie straps Jay onto a table)
JAY
(to volunteer) Now, young lady, if you'll please check the bindings.
(volunteer checks the straps)
JAY
You'll see they're very real, Very tight. Thank you. You may take your seat.
CHARLIE
Damn straight they're tight. You sure you can slip them?
EXT. FRONT OF BAR
VANCE'S ASSISTANT
Show's in an hour, Vance. Try to be on time.
(cut to show plate of swords falling down on Jay , cut back outside to show Vance with sword wounds- Jay stands up to applause, Vance falls to the ground dead.)
ACT 1
EXT. OUTSIDE OF A CLOTHING STORE
JEB
This isn't a trick, okay? I-I-I don't do tricks. This is a demonstration about demons and
angels, love and lust...
(Sam and Dean approach the crowd watching Jeb)
DEAN
What a douche bag.
JEB
...all that stuff mixed up in my head.
SAM
That's Jeb Dexter.
DEAN
I don't even want to know how you know that.
SAM
He's famous...kind of.
DEAN
For what, - Douchebaggery?
JEB
- ...how messed up it gets, don't touch me, okay? For your own safety.
( Jeb mimics spasming and throws some cards at the store window)
Go back to hell, demon!
(Jeb gestures to the one card now stuck on the other side of the store window)
Is this your card?
DEAN
You got to be kidding me. A fake demon possession? I can't believe people actually fall for that crap.
SAM
It's not all crap.
DEAN
What part of that was not a steaming pile of b.s.?
SAM
Okay, that was crap, but that's not all magicians. It takes skill.
DEAN
Oh, right. Right. I forgot. You were actually into this stuff, weren't you? I mean, you had -- You had, like, a deck of cards and a wand.
SAM
Dude, I was 13. It was a phase.
DEAN
Just -- It bugs me. Actually, it offends me. You know, playing at demons and magic, when the real thing will kill you bloody.
SAM
Like a guy who drops dead of 10 stab wounds without a single tear in his shirt?
DEAN
That's what I'm talking about.
INT. VANCE'S HOTEL ROOM
DEAN
So, did your boss have any enemies that you know of?
VANCE'S ASSISTANT
Vance had plenty of enemies.
DEAN
How so?
VANCE'S ASSISTANT
He would steal from other magicians... all the time.
DEAN
What would he steal?
VANCE'S ASSISTANT
Stage effects, closeup techniques --Anything he could get his hands on.
DEAN
Is that enough to get him killed?
VANCE'S ASSISTANT
These guys take this stuff pretty seriously.
(Vance's assistant searches until she finds a white fluffy bunny and picks it up)
There you are.
DEAN
Did you find anything weird in Vance's stuff?
(Sam gives Dean a look)
Well...weirder?
VANCE'S ASSISTANT
Matter of fact, I did. (she pulls out a tarot card showing a man stabbed by multiple swords)
SAM
I'm guessing this didn't belong to Vance.
VANCE'S ASSISTANT
He hated card tricks. Never wanted them around, let alone in his precious cape.
INT. JAY'S HOTEL ROOM
CHARLIE
You gonna tell me how you did it?
JAY
Did what?
CHARLIE
You know what.
JAY
The great ones never give away the "how."
CHARLIE
Yesterday you were sad, old, and dying. Today you're one of the great ones? Come on. This is me you're talking to.
JAY
You didn't think I could do it.
CHARLIE
No, Jay, I didn't. You're my friend, my best friend. I-I just didn't want to see you get hurt.
JAY
Charlie, you want to see something? Look at this.
( Jay does a card trick)
CHARLIE
Not bad.
JAY
"Not bad"? I've been working to pull an ace out of the middle of the deck for years just one --and now I can pull three.
CHARLIE
Still missing the ace of hearts.
JAY
I want to do the executioner tonight.
CHARLIE
Are you trying to get yourself killed?
JAY
It's just a rope slip.
CHARLIE
Houdini wouldn't try the executioner.
JAY
Exactly. Think about it, Charlie. If I can pull this off...
CHARLIE
I think you're pushing your luck.
JAY
It wasn't luck.
CHARLIE
It wasn't.
JAY
Here, stand over there. Let's not end up like this, Charlie --a couple of old farts doing birthdays and bar mitzvahs.
CHARLIE
It beats dying.
JAY
Does it?
CHARLIE
I would do anything for you. You know that. But I will not watch you die. I'll miss that show.
JAY
No, you'll be there. You're always there for me. Check your pocket.
CHARLIE
(Charlie finds the ace of hearts in his pocket)
That's good, Jay. That's pretty damn good.
JAY
I can do it, Charlie. I want to do it. Please.
INT. THEATER
JEB
It's a lame gig. I'm in a fleabag hotel doing this man-Of-The-People crap,
And freakin' Angel's in Vegas doing cirque du soleil! That should have been mine.
All right, boys, get it in gear. I don't got all day.
DEAN
You Vernon Haskell?
VERNON
Who's asking?
DEAN
Federal agent Ulrich. Looking into the death of Patrick Vance.
JEB
I'm Jeb Dexter. This is devil twist. We're chilling at the international magicians convention, which is a dope chance to tip my hat to the wicked cats who came before me. Smokin'-hot effect last night, Jim.
JAY
Jay. My name is Jay.
JEB
Yeah, whatever. We can loop it later.
VERNON
What a douche bag.
DEAN
Couldn't agree more. Is, uh...(Dean pulls out the tarot card ) this familiar to you?
VERNON
Should it be?
DEAN
Well, I heard that you used tarot cards in your act.
VERNON
My act? That was a long time ago. I haven't touched a deck in years, you know...
DEAN
Do know someone that might use them now?
VERNON
Well, there was a guy down on Bleecker Street.
CHARLIE
Oh, yeah. He -- He peddles that kind of specialty stuff.
DEAN
Did he have a problem with Vance?
VERNON
Matter of fact, Vance crossed him about a year ago. Probably cost him 50 grand in royalties.
DEAN
You know the exact address?
VERNON
426 Bleecker.
CHARLIE
Ask for chief.
DEAN
Chief. Thank you.
EXT. DARK ALLEY
(Dean knocks on a door)
DEAN
(to the man who opens the door) I'm, uh, here to see chief.
INT. DARK ROOM
MAN
Stay here. Don't touch anything.
( a door opens and Chief appears, wearing leather and holding a whip)
CHIEF
You are really gonna get it tonight, big boy.
DEAN
There's been a misunderstanding. I, uh, think I've been had.
CHIEF
Oh, you ain't been had...till you been had by the chief. Oh, and before we get started...what's your safe word?
INT. HOTEL ROOM
(Sam is at the desk with his laptop. He hears someone at the door and goes to answer it)
SAM
What are you doing here, Ruby?
RUBY
I should be asking you the same thing.
SAM
I'm working a job.
RUBY
The whole world's about to be engulfed in hellfire, and you're in magictown, u.S.A.
SAM
You got something against magic?
RUBY
That would almost be funny if 34 seals hadn't been broken already. 34, Sam. That's over halfway. The angels are losing this war. Every day is one day closer, and if someone doesn't do something soon --
SAM
And that someone is me?
RUBY
Who else would it be?
SAM
I don't know where these seals are. I don't know squat. So why don't you tell me
where you'd like me to start?
RUBY
Well, you can quit dicking around, for one.Bigger fish, Sam. And if the seals are being broken, you might want to go after the one doing the breaking.
SAM
Lilith?
RUBY
Cut the head off the snake. You're the only one who can stop her, Sam. So step up and kill the little bitch.
SAM
Oh, I'm game, believe me. It's not the psychic thing I got a problem with.
RUBY
Yeah, I know what you got a problem with, but tough. It's the only way.
SAM
No.
RUBY
You know, this would all be so much easier if you'd just admit to yourself that you like it. That feeling that it gives you.
SAM
You don't know what you're talking about.
RUBY
Oh, I don't, huh? Fine. It's simple -- Lucifer rises, the apocalypse starts. You think that you have demons on your hands now? People are gonna die, Sam. Oceans of people. So, you just let me know when you're ready.
INT. CLUB
DEAN
Find anything interesting?
SAM
What? Uh...no. You?
DEAN
Nothing I want to talk about or think about ever again.
VERNON
He's crazy, and you know it.
CHARLIE
He says he can do it.
VERNON
Did you even try to talk him out of it?
CHARLIE
Till I was blue in the face. But I tell you, Vernon, there was...there was something in his eyes.
VERNON
"In his eyes." You're both nuts.
DEAN
The chief, huh?
CHARLIE
What's the matter? The chief not your type?
DEAN
You know, I could have you both arrested for obstruction of justice.
VERNON
How? You're no fed.
CHARLIE
We con people for a living, son. Takes more than a fake badge to get past us.
DEAN
You got us. Yeah, we -- We are actually...aspiring magicians.
SAM
Yeah, we -- We came to the convention 'cause we thought we could learn something.
DEAN
Yeah, get some ideas for our new show.
VERNON
Ooh, what kind of show?
DEAN
Well, it's-- It's a --
SAM
It's a brother act.
DEAN
Yeah. Yeah, you know, with the rings and doves and...rings.
CHARLIE
You want to learn something? Stick around.
JAY
Ladies and gentlemen, what you're about to witness is a feat so daring,
So dangerous, even the great Houdini dared not attempt it. I give to you...The executioner!
INT. JEB'S HOTEL ROOM
(Jeb is posing in front of a mirror)
INT. CLUB
JAY
Now, sir, as you can see, this jacket is the real article.
Thank you, sir. You may take your seat.
Now, I will have one minute -- 60 seconds --To escape certain death.
Let's see if I can do it.
( the curtain falls and Jay's silhouette is seen struggling to get out of the straightjacket)
INT. JEB'S HOTEL ROOM
(as Jeb poses a noose moved by itself and positions itself behind him)
INT. CLUB
(Jay can be seen still maneuvering out of the straightjacket)
DEAN
I don't think he's gonna make it.
INT. JEB'S HOTEL ROOM
(the noose drops around Jeb's neck and pulls him up, hanging him)
INT. CLUB
(Jay pushes aside the curtain, unharmed)
DEAN
Oh! That was amazing! That was freakin' amazing!
SAM
That was...not humanly possible.
INT. JEB'S HOTEL ROOM
(Jeb hangs from the noose tied to the ceiling fan , dead)
ACT 2
INT. HOTEL ROOM
SAM
Looks like this guy Jay was a pretty big deal in the '70s.
DEAN
Which in magician land means what, exactly?
SAM
Big enough to play radio city music hall.
DEAN
What got him stuck in their "where are they now?" File?
SAM
He got old.
DEAN
Okay, so maybe incredible Jay is using real magic to stage a comeback.
SAM
It's possible. Some kind of spell that works a death transference.
DEAN
How does the tarot card mix into it?
SAM
I don't know.
DEAN
Man...hope I die before I get old. Whole thing seems brutal, don't it?
SAM
You think we will?
DEAN
What?
SAM
Die before we get old.
DEAN
Haven't we both already?
SAM
You know what I mean, Dean. I mean, do you think we'll still be chasing demons when we're 60?
DEAN
No, I think we'll be dead...for good. What? You want to end up like -- Like travis? Huh?Or Gordon, maybe?
SAM
There's Bobby.
DEAN
Oh, yeah, there's a poster child for growing old gracefully.
SAM
Maybe we'll be different, Dean.
DEAN
What kind of Kool-Aid you drinking, man? Sammy, it ends bloody or sad. That's just the life.
SAM
What if we could win?
DEAN
"Win"?
SAM
If there was a way we could just...put an end to all of it.
DEAN
Is there something going on you're not telling me?
SAM
No.
DEAN
Sammy.
SAM
No. Look, I'm just saying...I just wish there was a way we could...go after the source. That's all. Cut the head off the snake.
DEAN
Well, the problem with the snake is that it has a thousand heads. Evil bitches just keep
piling out of the Volkswagen.
SAM
Yeah. Guess you're right.
DEAN
Why don't you go see if you can track down Jay? I'll see what I can dig up on this tarot card.
INT. HOTEL LOBBY
SAM
Hey.
DEAN
Maid found Jeb hanging from the ceiling fan. Police think it was a suicide.
(Dean pulls out another tarot card, this time of the hanged man)
I beg to differ. Pulled a little sleight of hand myself.
SAM
On Dexter's body?
DEAN
Yeah, so I'm thinking if this spell is a death transference, then these cards work
like black-Magic targets.
SAM
Any connection between the victims?
DEAN
Jeb was a total douche bag to Jay yesterday.
SAM
What about the first vic? Uh, Vance?
DEAN
Asked around. Apparently, Vance was heckling Jay at the bar the day he was killed.
SAM
Okay, so Jay sneaks a card into Vance's pocket, does the table of death...
DEAN
And Vance takes 10 swords to the chest.
SAM
Then Jay slips a noose and Jeb doesn't. Hell of a trick.
DEAN
Yeah, I think it's time we had a little chat with Jay. Any luck tailing him?
SAM
He slipped me.
DEAN
He's a 60-Year-Old.
SAM
He's a magician.
(Sam & Dean follow Jay to his hotel room)
DEAN
Up against the wall!
JAY
God, who are you? What do you want?
DEAN
Now!
SAM
We know what you've been up to.
DEAN
You been working some real bad mojo to jump-Start your act.
JAY
What? I don't know what you're talking about.
SAM
Look, we know you put a spell on those tarot cards.
DEAN
Messing with real magic?
JAY
"Real magic"? Come on, there's no such thing as real magic.
DEAN
Oh, is that so?
JAY
Yeah, believe me. I've been around this stuff my whole life. It's all just --It's -- It's
illusions. It's tricks. It -- It's all fake.
DEAN
Jeb Dexter strung up --was that just an illusion?
JAY
What? Something happened to Jeb?
SAM
He was found hanged in his room. Right after you slipped the noose last night.
JAY
I don't know what you're talking about. Please...Just let me go.
DEAN
Something's not right.
SAM
Usually they're whipping some badass hoodoo at us by now.
(Sam & Dean have tied Jay to a chair)
DEAN
What do you want to do?
SAM
All right, so, if it's not him, who is it?
DEAN
Even if Jay's not working the magic, he's still getting the reward. His shows are selling out.
SAM
All right. So, then, whoever it is, they're obviously in Jay's corner.
DEAN
All right, so we got Vernon and Charlie on the list. Anyone else?
SAM
Uh...We could always ask him.
(Jay has escaped from the chair and is gone)
DEAN
Guess we should have seen that one coming.
SAM
Come on. He couldn't have gotten that far.
(Sam & Dean leave the room, Jay peeks out of the closet)
SAM
No way he could outrun us.
DEAN
Maybe he vanished. I mean, he really is good.
SAM
Or he found a back door.
(Jay comes up behind them as the police come into the lobby)
JAY
That's them! Those are the two nut jobs that just broke into my room!
ACT 3
INT. BACKSTAGE OF THEATER
JAY
They said my act is killing people. They said that I was using real magic, that I was casting spells on tarot cards.
CHARLIE
"Real magic." Those guys are nuts. You're lucky to be alive.
JAY
You don't think...
CHARLIE
What?
JAY
Well, the things that I can do now -- The cards.
CHARLIE
You've been working the cards your whole life.
JAY
Well, what about the escapes? I haven't been able to slip a pair of cuffs in 30 years.
And then there was the way that -- that patrick Vance died. And that Jeb Dexter.
CHARLIE
Yeah, no great loss there.
JAY
Oh, Charlie, he didn't deserve to die.
CHARLIE
You had nothing to do with it.
JAY
He was hanged the same night that I performed the executioner.
CHARLIE
Wait a minute. Are you telling me that you actually believe those guys? That there was some kind of "real magic" involved?
JAY
No. I don't know. I don't know, maybe. I shouldn't go on tonight, Charlie.
CHARLIE
Are you kidding me? You have a sold-out house out there. Sold out! When was the last time that happened?
JAY
The other night...When I was doing the table of death, I was, um...I was gonna kill myself. And I have no idea how I got out alive.
CHARLIE
But you did. Somehow, you did. Jay...when you were in your day you were incredible. "The incredible Jay." You were the best I ever saw. And now you got it back. I don't know how, but it doesn't matter. Just to see you at the top of your game again. Hell, it makes me feel young.
JAY
But
CHARLIE
No buts, Jay. This may be mana from heaven, I don't know, but whatever it is, you don't throw it away.
INT. THEATER- STAGE
(Jay lies on the table of death, Charlie lights the rope holding the plate of swords up, Charlie goes backstage to Vernon, Jay stands up unharmed)
WOMAN
Oh my god somebody gonna call 911
AUDIENCE MEMBER
I don't know
JAY
What's the...
(Jay finds Charlie covered in stab wounds)
INT. HOTEL LOBBY
SAM
Jay. Thanks for dropping the charges.
DEAN
You mind telling us why you did it?
JAY
We have to talk.
INT. BAR
JAY
I was just a kid when we first met. All I knew was how to cheat at cards. Charlie got me out of more scrapes than I can count. Hell, I would have been dead by the age of 20 if it hadn't been for him.[ Sighs ] he was more than my friend. He was my brother.
SAM
I'm sorry, Jay.
JAY
Look, I should have listened to you guys when you told me that my show was killing people.
DEAN
Well, you weren't the one pulling the trigger.
JAY
Yeah, but someone did, and I want to find out who did this to Charlie, so I'll do whatever you guys say. Just tell me what to do.
SAM
Jay, whoever's doing this...They like you. They're probably close to you. Did Charlie and Vernon get along?
JAY
No. No, it's not Vernon.
DEAN
He's the only one that makes sense.
SAM
Charlie and Vernon were your family, Jay.
DEAN
And now Charlie's gone.
JAY
Yeah, but...they butted heads sometimes, but Vernon could never do something like this.
DEAN
See, the thing about real magic is it's a whole lot like crack. People do surprising things
once they get a taste of it.
JAY
You better be damn sure about this. Vernon's all I got left.
INT. VERNON'S HOTEL ROOM
VERNON
( picks up phone)
Yeah? Yeah, okay. I'll be there in two shakes. I got something to tell you
anyway.
(after Vernon leaves, Sam and Dean enter Vernon's hotel room)
SAM
Wow. It's like a...magic museum.
DEAN
You must be in heaven. This guy doesn't travel light.
SAM
He's been on the road his whole life. Probably everything he owns is in this room.
DEAN
Let's get started.
INT. THEATER
VERNON
Just talked to the head of the convention. Headliner gig is yours.
(Jay turns around)
VERNON
What? You don't want it?
JAY
A day ago, if you told me I'd be standing on this stage...No, I can't do it, Vernon.
VERNON
What are you talking about?
JAY
Charlie's gone.
VERNON
Charlie would have wanted you to go on. This is your shot. It's our shot.
JAY
Really? This is what Charlie would have wanted? Charlie's dead.
VERNON
Hey, he was my friend, too, you know.
JAY
It's a hell of a way to treat a friend.
VERNON
Again, what are you talking about?
JAY
You killed him, didn't you? And for what? So that I -- So that we could be back on top?
VERNON
That's insane. (Chuckles ) no, you're scaring me.
JAY
First it was Vance, then it was Jeb . Even if you thought you were doing it for me, how in god's name could you kill Charlie?
VERNON
Oh, you are crazy.
JAY
You used me, and you used my act to do this to him. If you think --
MAN
I wouldn't be so hard on him, Jay. He didn't do it.
INT. VERNON'S HOTEL ROOM
DEAN
This is just a bunch of old-Timey magic stuff --None of it magic.
SAM
No herbs, no candles, and no tarot cards.
DEAN
I'll be damned.
SAM
What?
DEAN
(holds up poster)
Look like anyone we know?
INT. THEATER
VERNON
Sweet mary and joseph.
JAY
Charlie.
ACT 4
CHARLIE
It's really me, Jay.
VERNON
How the hell...
CHARLIE
God, you forget what it feels like to be young. It's amazing.
JAY
How old are you?
CHARLIE
Oh, it depends on what you mean by "old." Right now, technically,
about 28, but I've been around a lot longer than that.
JAY
How long?
CHARLIE
Long enough to have shilled for Barnum. And he gave me something.
JAY
What's that?
CHARLIE
The grimoire --A book of real magic. At first, I thought it was a scam, but then I tried one of the spells, and it worked. In fact, they all worked. So when I got to the end and there was one for immortality...
VERNON
My god, Charlie.
JAY
And my show, the things that I can do.
CHARLIE
Different spell. But it gives you a little taste of what's possible.
(Charlie pulls out a deck of tarot cards)
Oh, no, I wouldn't touch those, Vernon. They're --They're still radioactive.
JAY
You killed Vance and Jeb Dexter.
CHARLIE
What, you think this is a parlor game? You were being humiliated by those punks.
A washed-up old man who couldn't even defend himself.
JAY
You used me to do these terrible things.
CHARLIE
I used them to give you a gift. And you wanted it, Jay. I saw it in your eyes.
JAY
No, I never wanted this.
CHARLIE
You were ready to kill yourself. I saved your life.
VERNON
Is that right, Jay?
CHARLIE
I was there for you, like I've always been. Like I'll always be. Come with me, both of you.
You think the first time around was good? The second time's even better. All the know how, none of the aches and pain.
JAY
No, I won't do this. I won't.
CHARLIE
I've never made this offer before. But, then again, I've never had friends like the two of you before. Let me do this for you.
JAY
And who else has to die so that we can live forever? What's the price tag on immortality? This isn't right, Charlie, what you're doing. You know that. Somewhere, you know that.
CHARLIE
I know I don't want to come back alone, to start all over, alone.
VERNON
Jay...We can be young again.
CHARLIE
The three of us together --
Vital and alive...forever
DEAN
Not so fast! I ain't Guttenberg, and this ain't "Cocoon." Immortality. That's a neat trick.
CHARLIE
It's not a trick. It's magic.
(a noose appears behind Dean, drops around his neck and lifts him. Sam shoots Charlie, Charlie catches the bullet in his teeth)
CHARLIE
Hey, bullet catch --Been working on that.
DEAN
Get him!
SAM
Let him go -- Now!
CHARLIE
Just leave me and my friends alone. All right, I will give it up --The spells, the hexes. This is the last time. I promise.
(Charlie pushes Sam onto a the sword-table. Charlie clutches his stomach, where he is now bleeding.)
CHARLIE
Jay...You picked these strangers over me?
SAM
You okay?
DEAN
Yeah. Yeah, I'm all right.
ACT 5
INT. BAR
DEAN
Hey, Jay. We wanted to thank you for what you did yesterday.
JAY
I killed my best friend yesterday, and you want to thank me?
SAM
Where's Vernon?
JAY
Oh, he's gone. He said he didn't want to speak to me again after what I did to Charlie.
DEAN
Listen, Jay...you know Charlie was never gonna give up what he was doing. Ever. You did the right thing.
JAY
Are you sure about that? You know, Charlie was like my brother. And now he's dead... because I did "the right thing." He offered me a gift, and I just threw it back in his face. So now I have to spend the rest of my life old and alone. What's so right about that?
BARTENDER
Jay...your cards.
JAY
Throw them away.
DEAN
Well, I don't know about you, but...I could go for a beer.
SAM
I'm gonna take a walk.
EXT. ALLEY
(Sam opens the door to Ruby's car)
SAM
Okay.I'm in.
RUBY
What changed your mind?
SAM
I don't want to be doing this when I'm an old man.
END
