- "Blues Are Turning Black" by Stephen Emil Dudas
- (playing in the bar as Lucifer and Castiel talk about Jack; also played in 10.20 Angel Heart)
Lucifer: I got plenty of gripes with the old man. His self-righteous narcissism, His 'my way or the highway' quirk. I gotta hand it to Him. He had a couple of great seconds when He banged out the universe. Guy had creative chops. And optimism. I'll give Him that. And despite His pissiness and His massive lack of irony, He did give mankind a good time at bat and a chance to live in paradise. He ruled. He smote. He parted waters. Worshiped by creatures who made God in man's image. And then He got disappointed. Or worse, bored. Picked up all His toys and... left. What was that?
Michael: Hitched a ride on your temporal lobe. Saw your world. That paradise you left behind? Believe I'll take up residence, lend my guiding hand.
Hey, hey hey. I got an idea. Why don't you wail on Mary Winchester for a while? I'll get a latte, okay? Or not.
Michael: Look at you. You claim to be a god in your world. Here you're pathetic.
Hey, you try interdimensional travel sometime, pal. Definitely no frills. And just to be clear I never claimed to be God. Or a god, okay? Where I come from God is a paradox. He's everywhere, in your mind. In reality, He's nowhere. He left. I, on the other hand, am the real deal. I am everything humanity thinks I am and worse. That's who you're dealing with, pal. But hey, congratulations on being king of the hill of this dead rock.
Kevin, what are you doing, getting mixed up with Michael?
Kevin: I don't have a choice. I'm a prophet, so I serve God, but there's no God to serve, so I serve the ranking deity, which is Michael, because I don't have a choice because I'm a prophet.
Lucifer: Idiot. Can't you see Michael is a monster? Pure evil?
Kevin: Okay, I'm confused. Aren't you Satan? Which would make you the evil monster? And Besides, Michael's taking me to paradise world so I can meet hot women.
I'm sorry. What?
Dean: Don't mess with us, okay. You already killed Mick. You tried to kill us. You messed our mom right up. We're already pissed off. So I wouldn't do that.
Do I look stupid to you?
Ketch: Is that a trick question?
So, you're really going to sit there with a straight face and tell us that you have an evil twin?
Lucifer: Okay I get it, I get it. Custody of my son is a non-starter. But if you can please just shelve the eternal enemies thing for a second, we have a situation. And by 'we,' I mean everything alive. We're sorta... all gonna die.
Castiel: You'll forgive me if I'm a little on edge. The last time we were together, you killed me.
Lucifer: Well, last time we were together, you stabbed me.
Dean: You know I gotta hand it to you, that paper trail you cooked up, pretty impressive. But my gut told me it was bologna, looks like my gut was right. See, I've been in it with you, Arthur. I've seen your moves, we've gone toe-to-toe and I saw that look in your eye when asked about our Mom. So why don't you cut the crap?
Ketch: Actually, everything I told you was true. Well, except for the twin brother thing. I am separated from the British Men of Letters, lying low because they will kill me for desertion. I make a rather good living as a sort of soldier of fortune deep underground, for a certain sort of clientele who appreciate my skill set and I do use the name Alexander.
Asmodeus: As I was saying I'm a collector, I like to be prepared. Lucifer could be useful. Castiel is a card to play if the Winchesters get out of line. And if there is any truth to the story that a new version of Michael is coming, I'm really gonna need that Nephilim.
Ketch: You really needn't worry.
Trivia & References
Yeah, but isn't he too fast and furious for angels?
- The Fast and the Furious is an action film franchise based around street racing and heists.
I've assembled all the elements annotated in the angel tablets. Of course, I haven't done this before -- no one here has -- and any predictions are only predictive, not declarative probabilities being what they are or could be. Maybe. Or not. But a fly in the ointment exists.
- A "fly in the ointment" is a phrase denoting a minor flaw that can spoil something good.
Don't screw with me, worm.
Kevin: I'm a vertebrate, neither an annelid nor a nematode.
- Annelid is a scientific term for worm. A nematode is a species of roundworm.
Then how do you explain how Jack, the infamous Nephilm, along with the brothers Winchester all stayed in your no-tell motel?
- No-tell motel is slang for a motel used for the specific purpose of a sexual rendezvous.
Arthur was the family success story. The... headliner, our Donny Osmond.
Dean: Mm. All right, Marie. What's your story?
- Donny Osmond, along with his sister Marie are singers and actors best known for hosting the variety show Donny & Marie from January 1976 to January 1979.
All right. For arguments sake, we know Mom shot Arthur, and we know we dumped his corpse into the waste canal. So even if this is weird, yes, it's weird, but we eat weird everyday.
Dean: Yeah, but there's Ripley's Believe It or Not! weird, and then there's weird that's just straight up bull. Now I'm thinking that Ketch weird is door number two.
- Ripley's Believe It or Not! is a franchise known for there showcasing of strange feats and unusual claims.
Drop the blade, Dumas. Hesitate? This isn't going to be one of those 'make my day' moments is it? Okay, buh-bye.
- "Make my day" is a reference to the catchphrase made famous by the character "Dirty Harry" Callahan.
You get a name?
Dean: Nope. But, from his description -- Evil Colonel Sanders. Asmodeus.
- Colonem Sanders was an American business man, known for creating Kentucky Fried Chicken. The phrase "Evil Colonel Sanders" was attributed to Asmodeus by the Supernatural fandom soon after his debut.
Sides, Scripts & Transcripts